Bachelorette Survivor
For my best friend Karen's last night out with the girls as a single woman, we threw her a bachelorette party with the theme of her favorite television show, Survivor. There were six of us altogether and we whisked her away in a limousine without anything but the clothes on her back. While en route to our destination we laid down the rules for the evening.
Each of us had a challenge she was to complete. There was no particular order and she could select which one of us she wanted to present her with a task. If she failed the challenge, there would be a consequence. If the challenge was done exceptionally well, she could gain immunity from a future task, but only once. We poured her a cocktail and the other bride's maids and I made sure she understood the rules. Karen thought it was a great idea and she was game for anything. Then we each presented her with an x-rated gift that had to be used during the evening.
The gifts included a pair of leopard furred handcuffs, a penis ring pop, a red satin garter belt with white feathers along the trim, a Pin the Cucumber on the Hunk game that sent everyone into hysterical laughter, a box of condoms, edible underwear and cans of whip cream, a pair of dice that combined to give sexual instructions and last but not least, a piñata in the shape of a penis. A two-foot long piñata that would surely garner some attention. I placed a small combed veil in Karen's hair so that everyone would know it was a bachelorette party.
We arrived at one of Karen's favorite restaurants and headed straight for the bar. Karen was wearing her penis ring pop, the garter belt on her thigh and the piñata over her shoulder (we had attached a rope for carrying it.) The rest of her "survivor items" were in a large white handled bag with the words Bachelorette Survivor on it. She picked me for her first challenge and I happily handed it over. Karen swigged back a shot of tequila and was ready to go. Karen had to hand out condoms to five good looking guys and get them to blow them up at the same time. It took her only a couple of minutes to succeed. We were all impressed, as were the other patrons at the bar. One down, five to go.
Karen's next challenge required her to blow up the cucumber, tape the poster of the hunk on a wall, and pin the cucumber where it belonged on the first three tries. We tied a napkin around her head, spun her and sent her on her way. The whole bar watched as she helplessly made her way, never getting to the right anatomical spot. Since she failed, she had to drink another shot. Her third challenge went a little better. She had to roll the dice and do exactly what they said. If she didn't like the roll, she could roll again, but it would cost her. Karen crossed her fingers and hoped for the best. The dice came up "give a lap dance." Up for the challenge, she approached a couple sitting at a table. She whispered something to the girl and she nodded in approval. Karen moved over to the guy, who had no idea what was about to happen, pulled his chair out from the table and started dancing in front of him. He looked to his girlfriend who gave him the okay smiled and he looked back at Karen. Everyone in the bar was watching and the guys all started cheering her on. She moved her hips, bent over in compromising positions, and all in all did a great job. We all applauded when she was through and agreed to give her immunity for a future stint.
We gave Karen a rest and enjoyed some appetizers. The bartender was instructed to make Karen a 'sex on the beach' while the rest of us enjoyed other fruity drinks. The bar was crowded now and most everyone knew about the bachelorette. Karen's next job was to have a guy take off her garter belt with his teeth. Piece of cake, she told us, and went on the prowl. She found some cute guys in the corner and after a moment of conversation, one of them got down on his knees and did the job. We all hollered in approval and as a souvenir Karen let the guy keep the garter. She was feeling pretty cocky now and handled the next challenges easily.
Unbeknownst to Karen, we saved the best challenge for last (we all had it in our other pocket.) Karen was told to take her handcuffs and cuff herself to a guy wearing army fatigues. Any part of his clothing would due. She searched for a few minutes and then spotted a guy at the other end of the bar. He was a gorgeous guy with a well toned upper body. Having gone this far, Karen wasn't about to back out of a dare so she strutted over. He readily gave her his wrist and before she knew what was happening he had uncuffed himself, had her hands cuffed behind her back, sat her on the barstool, hit the button on his boom box and started to strip. We all raced to watch as Karen sat stunned and embarrassed while the stripper thrust himself at her, getting so close she could smell every inch of him. The guy danced until he was down to a g-string, flexed his tight buns next to her, turned and bent oh so close to her neck, then released her handcuffs.
Karen had survived her bachelorette party and we congratulated her on her good sportsmanship. She said it was awesome and she was glad to have us all in her tribe.
